My Initiation

I have often thought of what it would be like to be a mom.  I have watched many of my friends in action as moms and a lot of the times I would be like "thank God I am not having to deal with that!". Welllll my time has come.... I feel like I have earned a beginner badge and my initiation into motherhood has began.  Here are a few things that I have experienced:

• About 3 days after getting Jada I was on my way to church and I suddenly slammed on brakes.... I had to look down my shirt to make sure I put a bra on.  Due to complete exhaustion it would not have surprised me one bit if when I had looked that I would have been "bare".

• I have actually took my thumb and index finger and pinched a wod of snot from your lip.  My gah!!!.... I feel like I have an outer body experience when I do it.  And I have no idea what to do with it once I pinch it.  I just panic and start flinging.  Admit mamas.... you have done this when bib, rag, tissue or wipe has not been present.

• Josh and I were waiting for a table at a restaurant... I just kept getting a woof of this stank!  We finished our dinner and went to the big ol Wal Mart... there I realized what the stank was.... THROW UP! It was all down the back of my arm. Thanks babe...thanks for looking out for me.

• Gagging reflexes have went into full swing.  I am not big on smells.  Right after getting her and for at least 2-3 more months she would drop these chili bombs! I mean fill a diaper full of it.  Looked like a complete explosion went off.  And rank!!!... geeze it was rough. 

• Checking diapers.... this is tricky! One must always be prepared for the worst.  I feel like I need to put on gloves and a mask to check the diaper if I get a whiff of funk when she walks by.  I have went to check a diaper and come out with a completely different colored finger. Gag a maggot!! That is another one of those times where I just cant get it off fast enough.  I feel like Ace Ventura when he runs out of the bat cave in "When Nature Calls".

• I have picked up many of dog poop in my day... but she laid us a little loaf on the floor one day.  Just a pile of human feces on my floor.  She was pretty proud of herself.

• Jada does not sleep with us unless she is sick.  She prefers her bed.  She should have a black belt in kung fu.  I have been peed on,  karate chopped, kicked, head butted, slapped and punched.  It is like she becomes possessed by Laila Ali when she enters my bed.

• I can turn nocturnal.... when she is sick I do not sleep!! Mostly for the reasons I just listed but I cant sleep when she coughs so much she chokes.  I have laid awake many nights just waiting to pat her on the back to help her get that mess out of her chest. 

• I have went to go in to give her a kiss..... and a big ol sneeze happens which results in snot on my mouth!!! Yuck!

• Our going out to eat has decreased to almost non-existent.  It is just not worth the hassle.  Again, something takes over her body and she is like "oh, you want to have a nice calm dinner?...not gonna happen folks".  Her behaviour makes me want to order the stiffest drink they can make.  I have this intense feeling to light a fire in the waiters tail and make him/her move just a bit faster.  The faster you get my food the more your tip is going to be.... I PROMISE!

• I find that our television stays on some type of  Disney channel majority of the time. I have actually caught myself sitting down and watching it when she isn't even around.  Felt like a complete psycho.

• Right after we got her I lost a lil weight.  I was so exhausted.... I only had 3 days off from work and I was allowed to work till 2:30 for 2 weeks.  Soooo I was a bit of an emotional basket case.  One night my sis in law so kindly brought over food for me (josh was out of town).... as she was entertaining Jada I literally snuck into a corner and ate that bowl of jambalaya like a Holocaust refugee. I was starving!! But I was always so tired to cook a big meal for us so I would just make sure Jada had dinner and I would do without.  I would rather sleep.  So folks if someone you know has just had a baby.... go cook them a meal, fold their clothes, maybe give them a B12 injection, wash their dishes, etc.  It makes a huge difference and allows the parentals to rest... or in my case EAT.

I have enjoyed this journey so much and I would not trade it for anything or any amount of money in this world!  Josh and I did not have nine months to prepare.... we had a split second.  We do the best we can and make the most out of each moment.  I like things a certain way with her and if one does not like it.... well I hate it. It's just the way it is and is going to be.  I have slacked up a lot and opened my wings to let her look out a bit more. But she is my special baby, my first and I am very protective of her and I will not apologize for that. 

To all you moms out there.... I salute you!

You Call Him Da Da....

Jada,
As I said in the last letter to you, you and your Da Da are amazing together.  I have known your daddy for almost 16 years.  He was and still is the love of my life.  I love him as much as I love you but in a completely different way.  I did not think I could love that guy anymore than I already did but I was wrong.... I watch him with you and my heart melts and I fall in love with him all over again.

When you were just a picture on our phone we would talk about you constantly.  We laid in bed countless nights and talked about you.  We sent the same pics of you via text back and forth to one another countless times.  You were on our minds constantly.  Your daddy would say that he loved you so much already and that he would do whatever he had to do to get you where you needed to be and he meant it.

I always knew that daddy would be a good daddy.... but he surpasses that.... he is an amazing father to you.  It is not about getting you anything you want, although you do, it is about the love and one on one time he gives you.  He is so proud of you.  He talks about you literally all day.  You are what consumes our days.  Anything we do now, we think of you and how it affects you.  He is not in this huge rush for you to get "big" so he can take you places..... he bonds with you now!  He knows that hunting, riding, racing and farming will come with time.  He doesn't expect that you will love all of those things.  He just enjoys you and what your age brings right now. He helps me with you oh so much.  I don't have to ask him for much bc he usually already has it done or is doing it. He just dove into this parenthood stuff.  He changes PEE PEE diapers... ONLY (he he he), gives you a bath, cooks supper for us, gets you dressed, puts you to bed, fixes your juice, goes with me to the Dr. with you, gets up to give you breathing treatments in the middle of the night bc i am absolutely exhausted, consoles you, plays tea party with you, watches cartoons with you, does the hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog dance with you, and pretty much whatever else you want or needs to be done.

Mornings are y'alls thing.  He has a way with you in the mornings.  That is y'alls special time.  You do not fret with him one bit.... with me....you give me HECK!  This is yours and his routine:  Gets you out of bed, fixes your juice, turn on cartoons while changing your diaper, sit for about 20-30 minutes and watch cartoons, gets you dressed and wait for me to finish getting dressed. That routine makes you super happy and when you do not get it it's rough for all involved.

You are one lucky girl, Jada.  You have no idea, right now, how lucky you are.  You love him so much.  I can see it in your pretty blue eyes when you look at him.  You miss him when he's gone and ask about him every minute.  "Want Da Da" is what you say constantly.  I pick you up from Tiny's and you immediately start asking about him.  You know his vehicle and get excited when we pull in the drive way and it's there. You are much more affectionate with da da than you are me when we are all together.  I get loving when he's gone but if he is home..... I am chopped liver. I do not mind though. The other night when he got home from being gone for a few days.... you wanted him to pick you up and you just stared into his eyes.  You would just stare and smile. You also put your little hand on his face and just rubbed his cheek and smiled.  COMPLETE melting of the heart.  You will just sit in his lap and wallow all over him and kiss and love.  Which is right up his alley bc he is super affectionate.  He has no problem telling you that you are beautiful and that he loves you oh so much.  You will learn to appreciate that one day.

There are so many more stories of the two of you but I will save for a later time.....I put some pics below of you and him. Yall are buds and mean the world to one another. And I love you both more than I could ever explain.  It cannot be put into words.  I look at you two together and my eyes swell with tears bc you both make me the happiest girl in the world.  You are super special to us both.  You have shown us a whole new world.  And I hope no one ever tries to tell us that bc you are not biologically ours that we have missed something..... BC I MIGHT WIND UP IN THE JAILHOUSE TIMES!

I love you,
Mama

Mean Muggin

Being Silly

He will do whatever you want to do

First time to get out at your new home.... and he insisted on getting you out

Waking up for the first time in your new home..... da da had to get morning loving

First time at Davids.... he had to show you off

Anything to make me pee my pants

You cheered him on for literally an hour

Morning time!

You, Da Da and Bank Bank